Dear Coronavirus,
You suck. Because of you I've been stuck at home with both kids and have to do HBL (hell based learning). It's not like I don't have anything else to do... oh wait - I actually don't because you're the reason my day job has ground to a halt too. At least that's given me a bit more time once the kids are in bed to crochet. So I've crocheted a physical version of you with a dumb smile so I can punch you. In the face. Repeatedly.
Edited to add. Some of you have asked for the pattern so here it is. It's basically a ball with red bits. I've written it out for ease:
Virus spore [in grey yarn]
R1 Magic ring, 6sc into ring
R2 sc inc x 6 (12)
R3 1sc, sc inc x 6 (18)
R4 2sc, sc inc x 6 (24)
R5 3sc, sc inc x 6 (30)
R6 4sc, sc inc x 6 (36)
R7 5sc, sc inc x 6 (42)
R8 6sc, sc inc x 6 (48)
R9 to R13 sc 48 (48)
R14 6sc, sc dec x 6 (42)
R15 5sc, sc dec x 6 (36)
R16 4sc, sc dec x 6 (30)
R17 3sc, sc dec x 6 (24)
R18 2sc, sc dec x 6 (18)
R19 1sc, sc dec x 6 (12)
Stuff the ball with polyester filling.
R20 sc dec x 6 (6)
Sew the 6 stitches closed.
Red spikes [apparently they're proteins]
Make about 18.
ch 6, sl st into 2nd ch from hook (this forms the first triangular spike), ch 3 then sl st into 2nd ch from hook (2nd spike), ch 3 then sl st into 2nd ch from hook (final spike), sl st 3 to form the stalk. Leave a long yarn tail to sew onto the grey ball.
Probably easiest in chart form:
The yellow/orange/white bits. Sew randomly, spread out on grey ball.
Then with orange embroidery thread (using the whole 6 strands), sew on 2 french knots close to each other onto virus spore.
With white fluffy yarn, sew on one loose french knot.
With pale yellow embroidery thread, sew on a bigger french knot (I wound the thread around the needle about 6 times) onto virus spore.
Finally, sew on with black yarn or thread, eyebrows and a stupid smile.
Add on safety eyes. I placed them between rows 9 and 10, 5 stitches apart.
Have fun punching!
.heic)
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